This date, an ordinary days for everyone else, except for me.
This is a day where I get slapped hard on my face.
Yes, this is a day.
Maybe this seem like a small matter, but I just can't bear with it.
I feel like I just humiliated myself, shows my dumbness in front others.
I just feel like: How can I done that silly mistake? What am I actually doing this whole sem?
Previous post I mentioned how unlucky is my recent days.
Those are actually a sign before the storm.
Yes I know I didn't perform well this semester, yes I know my mistakes.
But today, I can't bear it anymore.
Those karma are too much. I can't bear it.
Collapsed in front of my friends, in front my teammate.
I am showing them how weak and incapable I am.
I need some times to recover. I really need it.
I need some times to forgive myself, and give myself strength to stand up again.
Recently I may spread too much of negative energy.
I apologize.
Let me shower myself in the storm. I will then stand in front of you with the refreshed me.
Wednesday, August 6, 2014
Friday, August 1, 2014
Overload with trash
I don't know why, didn't even know how,
recently I just feel that my life turns out to be kinda sucks and demotivating.
Com'on! I just told myself that:
Ellyssa, you need to take your degree life very serious and don't mess it up! you screwed nearly 10 weeks of your first semester, you need to be serious and focus now!
Okay, then happily I have raya holidays at hometown, relaxing and then!
Why I feel like my KL life start to be miserable!
Even small things, a small tiny little thing, couldn't go smoothly.
Nego, PSM.... Dafuqq! Are you kiddng me?!
Yes I knew that we did not done it well and nice, but how can it be so sucks?
PSM?! Hello, you told me that I did well when my " Search Inside presentation right?
And then today you told me that I didn't do well actually.
Do you have your medicine already? Do you need a full body check?
You like giving me a sweets and then today you tell me that: nahhh... that sweets I just borrow you. You need to give me back.
I don't really hate you, but an you just don't try to challenge my heart?
Die because of heart attack is not in my list!
Overall, I think I can't perform well this semester.
I can't actually believe that I show such a "good" performance.
It is totally under my expectation. Believe that I can perform better.
Well, this semester is a sucks appetizer.
I hope whats coming will taste good.
And please, recently I need good lucks to help me to face those stress.
So, I hope that every bad things end tonight.
12am, the end.
Wish me luck! :)
recently I just feel that my life turns out to be kinda sucks and demotivating.
Com'on! I just told myself that:
Ellyssa, you need to take your degree life very serious and don't mess it up! you screwed nearly 10 weeks of your first semester, you need to be serious and focus now!
Okay, then happily I have raya holidays at hometown, relaxing and then!
Why I feel like my KL life start to be miserable!
Even small things, a small tiny little thing, couldn't go smoothly.
Nego, PSM.... Dafuqq! Are you kiddng me?!
Yes I knew that we did not done it well and nice, but how can it be so sucks?
PSM?! Hello, you told me that I did well when my " Search Inside presentation right?
And then today you told me that I didn't do well actually.
Do you have your medicine already? Do you need a full body check?
You like giving me a sweets and then today you tell me that: nahhh... that sweets I just borrow you. You need to give me back.
I don't really hate you, but an you just don't try to challenge my heart?
Die because of heart attack is not in my list!
Overall, I think I can't perform well this semester.
I can't actually believe that I show such a "good" performance.
It is totally under my expectation. Believe that I can perform better.
Well, this semester is a sucks appetizer.
I hope whats coming will taste good.
And please, recently I need good lucks to help me to face those stress.
So, I hope that every bad things end tonight.
12am, the end.
Wish me luck! :)
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